Facebook shared its review of my year 2014, though I did not endorse it. Nothing against FB’s compilation about me. In fact, it captured plenty of blissful moments I had throughout the year, filled with celebrations, travels and social living, fitness, community engagement and giving-back.
A little flashback! We celebrated my birthday in the Spring, and my son’s birthday in the Summer; traveled to visit Atlanta family in April; visited Philly-based friends in May; and more friends in Pittsburg in November. We enjoyed the child’s extracurricular achievements: obtaining a yellow belt in Tae-Kwon-Do; a Bobcat badge in Cub Scout; his name plastered on the “Wall of Fame” in the Summer Reading Program at our local library, and multiple Certificates of Appreciation collected from reading to Therapy dogs in our library ‘Paws ’n Pages’ programs. Don’t forget ‘Trick-or-Treat’ on Halloween, first pumpkin carving before Thanksgiving, playing at the park, riding his bike, playdates with the neighbors and plenty of experimenting with baking and other cooking. this might all sound like it was “all about the child”, but I had my fun too, keeping well and fit, rolling on the hills of Mount Pocono, and “Run[ning] and getting Dye[d]”. Plenty of “firsts” recorded, since re-sailing ashore, including settling in suburbia America for the first time. So, it was a good year!
Well then, why did I not endorse “Facebook ‘glitz n glamorous’ review of my YR2014? Perhaps because I have another version of my year, blasted in one word ‘Displacement’! I started off the year with a lot of positive vibes, umph and soccer mom power, resolving to keep it rolling positive all-year round. Too bad resolutions are not meant to last 265 days [or are they?]! The Year 2014, rolled out a tougher, more challenging and less appealing side of itself, testing me several times to keep it real resolution-like. Not know to “conform to the norm” [oops! Did I just confess that I kind of break and make the rules, sometimes 😏], I kind of reshuffled my resolution, inadvertently, and picked up a couple new preoccupations for the year 2014. Makes me wonder, if I should totally give up on resolutions….!
My emotions, my joys, my confidence, my umph, stability all got ‘jerked up’. My optimism, my security, my sense of self and hope, fell victim too! True, I had some semblance of support system ‘dans temps en temps’, and here and there, but a larger part of what I know of myself and what I have cultivated of myself became displaced. I regard myself to be a strong independent savvy and creative person. I can sell every part of myself [decently] for the greater good of family, community and self. I give and trust openly, and fight for what it right, just, fair and worthy. As a young college Sophomore, I was already visiting supermax prisons facilities, interviewing inmates deemed the most dangerous persons, petitioning government criminal justice institutions for human rights violations, and mobilizing legal aid and human right entities to provide pro bono legal representation for indigents. All that, pursued and accomplished without much of a clout of contact cards or diploma papers, but the zeal and thirst to just do it! See what I am saying: Been there, done that! I am tougher than deer meat!
Yet, 2014 flustered me into many moments of self-doubt and self-criticisms, causing me to cow into myself! Though, when you have an extra mouth to feed, you do not have the luxury to dissolve completely. You cannot let go, no matter what you do. Instead, you listen to Aaliyah…“Dust Yourself Off and Try Again…” You need to succeed, and you need to chase success hard and faster than the wind, with all the aggression and persistence, because there are plenty more chasing before and after you.
How have I done that? Find the things that bring a smile to your face and brain, adopt them up or keep doing and reigning them. In my case, I go out running miles to stay sane mentally and emotionally. My favorite runs are in the rain, although that seems to have claimed my delicate mobile phone, causing me to ‘need’ a new one before end 2014. Whenever I go out, I wear a strong happy face because the world does not need to interface with your suffering; it is loaded with plenty of its own! While out dropping and picking up child from the school bus stop, I spend a minute or more, chatting with the moms to share about us and catch up on ’the village gossip”. I scout for and get involved in social engagements to meet new people, projects and places. I signed up child for Tae-Kwon-Do and Cub Scout, to grow our social/community circles where we live, in the middle of everywhere! Together, we participated in Cub Scout “Go-See-It, at the environment centers, Veteran’s Day commemorations, visited a Radio station, the Volunteer Fire Department, toured the library, and the summer street fair. Plenty more of course, at different seasons throughout the year. Of course, I read, read and read, as I write, write and write. That helps put me ‘onboard’ to share my reflections and my passions.
Among my greatest passions is to aggressively defend the “Wholeness of the Human Spirit, beyond the color-line”, and our “Common Blackness in Diversity”. Toward the end of 2014, I spent a large chunk of me, highlighting the human worth, human dignity, and uniformity of Black people. Ironically, even among descendants from a black heritage, are many preoccupied with highlighting and advocating differences than sameness of Black Folks! Still, I am passionately committed to defending the peremptory norm of the “Right to Be”, “to Self-Determine”, “to Self-Define”, as a right for all, and the indisputable danger of a single story. More so, to forge, afford and guarantee a decent living for us all!
May 2015 be the year of new tears of happiness, slim body and fat bank accounts, ripe investments, hope to reality, thriving family, and smashed records! And if it maybe displacement, again, may displacement be in a comfortable open, free and and happy place of belonging and proprietorship!
Happy 2015, Y’all!